I walked out of treatment feeling fine. I was actually all smiles.
Jonathan put my patch on my arm – one week’s worth of anti nausea defense.
I lazed in my lawn chair taking in God’s version of Vitamin D and hung out with Peanut as Jon ran K’Lee to life guarding training. JT was off skating with friends. I don’t get a ton of time alone at home because my family is very protective of me which is good. But I’ve always been the kind of person that just needs some quiet, all by myself time. I was thankful for my nothing time in the sunshine.
Later, I watched one of my buying-the-someplace-by-the-ocean shows. I went to the Caymans this time. I watched some news. And then chemo hit! My husband said it washed right over my face in a matter of ten minutes. I lost my balance and struggled to walk to my bathroom and the nausea came on. This time he gave me a pill for nausea, a wet cloth, and my double lined trashcan. He put a movie on for me to watch, and I inwardly laughed at what our Friday Date Night had changed into. This is love!
The nausea drugs bring on the restless leg syndrome but not as bad as the kind they used to put in my premeds cocktail. The nausea hasn’t left, so another round of pills before bed plus something to help me sleep.
Success – I never actually threw up, but I gagged and heaved which is sometimes worse I think. The restless legs stayed a way.
Sleeping – unsuccessful. I woke up nauseated. I woke up with hot flash after hot flash. I woke up at the slightest noise. I woke up hungry but didn’t dare to eat. I woke up with my mouth feeling like it was shoved full of cotton balls. I woke up from a nasty headache. Not the restful night I had hoped for.
Abraxane is starting to act a lot like AC chemo. My body just doesn’t tolerate poison well. This scares me because AC chemo took me away from work a lot and crashed my counts. Please pray for God to provide for us if His will is for the poison to run its course furiously. Perhaps that’s what is needed to kill all the cancerous cells. I have to believe God knows best.
God has a plan, and it is good!
Psalm 63:8 – I cling to you; your right hand upholds me.