April 5, 2014: My Daughter’s Dream in Heaven

*My daughter, K’Lee, has granted me permission to share her dream in Heaven. Little did either of us know at the time how much this dream was needed to prepare me for my battle against breast cancer. This is rewritten exactly as I wrote it in my journal on the evening she told me.

K’Lee told me abut a dream she had this evening. It was fascinating. Eyes don’t lie they say. I can tell you only truth was there. The recognition showed all over her face. It was awesome.

K’Lee’s Moment in Heaven

*Standing on a step seemingly below or right outside of Heaven, K’Lee states she is aware of every time she’s doubted God or didn’t believe or have faith in Him or His wisdom. She says its the worst feeling in the world, and she wished for nothing more than to rid the doubt or lack of faith.

*Jesus touches her – like reaches out his hand to her and lifts her off the step and into Heaven. At the moment he touches her, she says you know you’ve been forgiven and you are loved. She explains this type of forgiveness and love as unexplainable – perfect, unconditional love.

*Jesus hugs her. He feels like a person – not like a ghost. He says, “Welcome home!”

*She says everything is bright – an unexplainable level and color of bright.

*Heaven feels so incredibly peaceful, calm, and truly happy.

* Jesus tells her someone is there who wants to see her. She walks with Jesus down a road. A young man comes out to meet them. She says she knows he’s my dad. Jesus disappears out of her line of vision.

*She says my dad is very young looking with a strong face, but it’s his smile she never wants to forget. She says it is so full of happiness. Even on Earth, she said she would be drawn to his smile. She said he looks strong and perfect. His hair was brown. She couldn’t remember what color his eyes were, but he didn’t have any wrinkles and his complexion was perfect, flawless. She said she felt unconditional love from him, and she knew him. He asked her if she remembered sitting on his lap before she was born and she said she kinda laughed and said I’d told her she’d told me that before, but she wasn’t sure if she still remembered or if she just remembered being told the story. She said he told her he remembered and he’d been watching her and keeping an eye on her since she was was born.

*They walked through a part of Heaven. She said there was a huge, perfectly white building with columns in the front and two large, beautiful brown doors that were really tall. She said you could feel God’s power and love just standing there. Jesus walked through the big doors, but she didn’t think anyone else was allowed inside. She knew she wasn’t. The angels stood on each side of the door on this platform. Then there were steps going down. No one touched the building, not even the steps. The angels seemed to sing, or at least call everyone closer. Some people got on their knees. Everyone worshipped and praised God.

*She said angels are hard to describe. They are huge beings. Very tall – about 9-10 feet tall. They have wings but not like a bird. Their wings are more like light – too hard to explain because there isn’t anything like it here. Their faces are hard to fixate on because they are constantly changing and look like lots of faces all at the same time. She said their songs are awesome, and you hear them inside your head and not through your ears. You understand everything even though you know it’s being spoken in millions of languages at once. There isn’t a language barrier in Heaven. She said the angels are like a being inside of this bright light sprinkled in gold glitter. They don’t really walk or fly when they move. She says its more like water bending or like they shimmy. On Earth, they might look like monsters, but in Heaven she was in awe of them.

*Everyone in Heaven is happy, truly happy. She said everyone looks perfect – No wrinkles, no scars, no tattoos, no piercings, no disabilities – perfect. Every race she’s ever seen and many she’s never seen are there, but no one cares. Everyone loves everyone because everyone loves God.

*She said beside the pure white building it looked like a market place, but no one was selling anything or buying anything. She said there was food everywhere, but no one was eating while she was there. She said she only saw fruit. Exotic fruit – fruit she had never seen before. She wondered if it was extinct on Earth. It look delicious, but she wasn’t hungry. She didn’t think about eating it.

*All the people were happy and talking around the market place. She heard people talk about Noah, Mark, and James. She knew they were important by the way everyone spoke of them.

*She said she could see all these faces she’d never seen before, but all she remembers about them now is how happy everyone was and how much they loved each other.

*There seems to be a hierarchy of sorts, but no one seems to care. It’s as if everyone understand that’s just the way it is and it’s not to be questioned.

*There are NO negative feelings in Heaven. No sadness, no hurt, no pain, no suffering.

*My dad lead her away from the market to a little log cabin near pine trees and a small creek. She said she never went inside the cabin, nor did she ask if it was my dad’s. She just knew it was his. She couldn’t tell me how she knew. She just said she knew.

*Dad asked her if she wanted to see her family on Earth and she said “yes”. He lead her to a place near the cabin. He said few people knew of it. She said it kind of opened up allowing them both to see Earth. Me crying at this point. She said my dad grew very quiet. She said she could understand my feelings – great empathy, but she wasn’t sad. She kept telling me not to be sad for here because she was in a much better and perfect place. She wanted me to believe, to have faith, to understand. My dad told her I struggled to believe – to have faith, to understand – when he left too. She said it bothered him, but he understood. He told her he checked on all of us from time to time, but he had been watching her since before she was born. She said he made her feel special. He talked to her about going to see her family, but she woke up before that happened.

*While with Jesus, she said she felt like the center of his attention as though she was the only one that mattered to him in that moment.

*Everyone wears a lot of clothes in Heaven. everyone is very modest.

*There’s no time in Heaven. She understands forever.

*Jesus’ love is perfect – there’s no other way to describe it she says.

*The “sin” we all get caught up in on Earth isn’t even what God sees. He sees your doubt and your unfaithfulness to Him. Those are the things that hurt Him the most. He knows you’re going to sin every day, but He give you another chance tomorrow to get it right, but in reality He just wants you to believe in Him and in everything He says is true.

*Everyday we are given trials, tribulations, or guidance. Some days we fail and God uses that failure to help us become more faithful later because if our lives were perfect, why would we need God?

*K’Lee says God creates us in the hope we choose Him knowing He gave us free will not to. He will put people and events in our lives to try and get us to seek Him, but we must make the choice to do so. Even though He knows the possibilities and our character traits, He doesn’t ultimately know what our final choice will be. If He knew we’d choose Hell over Heaven, He would have never created us because He loves us all so much. He wants us all in Heaven.

*K’Lee says the worst kind of Hell would have to be living with the guilt of knowing God was real and knowing you choose something temporary to believe in over something that would love you perfectly forever.

*K’Lee doesn’t speak of Heaven and Hell as places. She says they are more like dimensions that are very hard to describe.

*Time is also something she says man has created and isn’t really what we’ve tried to make it.

*She says seeing Heaven and trying to explain it to someone else is like a man who’s never been able to see opening his eyes at the end of his life and seeing the world for the first time. It’s not going to look anything like the people in his life described it to him, but he’s going to stand there in awe of it anyway.

*Heaven is a perfect kind of beautiful we can’t comprehend here on Earth. Our standard of beauty fails in comparison.

*Being “good” isn’t what God desires from us. He only wants us to believe in Him and have faith He will do as he has promised.

*Our witness to others isn’t through our words, or our actions, but through our faith.

*Lucifer and sin are not discussed in Heaven.

*K’Lee said there was so much more she wanted to remember and wanted to tell me, but she can only remember there is more and can’t remember exactly what those things were.

Little did I know what an impact this dream would have on my life. For too long of my life, I had believed I would be judged and condemned by my “sins” and how could I ever be “good enough” for God if I wasn’t “good enough” for others or even myself. It was as if I was finally able to allow myself to let go of all the “yuck” in my life and allow myself to be forgiven and to forgive myself. Over the course of the next few months, I would “find” God in the morning right before dawn as I ran. He would speak to me and was preparing my heart, mind, and body for what was coming. He was getting me ready for battle, to fight. That’s why I can say with conviction that God has a plan, and it is good.


About courage2conquercancer

At the age of 40, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. This is an account of my journey from my discovery and beyond.
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